So, I’m a little behind on my posts here. Just trying to get some in when I have a chance. This post is all about getting Lily ready to be a big sister and how she has been adjusting to her new role.
I was quite worried when I found out I was pregnant about how Lily would react when the day finally arrived. I had been hoping she would be a little younger so that the change would be quickly forgotten. I am now glad that she was older because she is a great helper. It took some time for her to realize that I was serious when I told her there was a baby growing in my belly. I wanted her to be a part of everything, I thought that it would help her understand what was happening. I took her to all my check-ups where she got to hear the baby’s heartbeat. After a couple check-ups she began playing doctor at home, she would pretend that anything was a stethoscope and listen to Sasha’s heartbeat. When we were at the doctor’s office, the doctor would let her use her stethoscope and Lily would put the stethoscope to my arm and tell me she was listening to my heartbeat. It was really interesting to see this play emerging. As the pregnancy progressed she began talking about the baby in her belly. We talked about the baby moving although she was rarely interested in actually feeling the movements in my belly. I also took her to the library to borrow books about becoming a big sibling. Most of them were not very helpful. But, we did borrow one about dinosaurs that seemed to really make sense to her. Dino Baby by Mark Sperring was very helpful. It was the only book she asked to read more than once, I believe it was the only one we made it to the end of, and she remembered a lot of the do’s and don’t’s outlined in this book after the baby was born without any prompting. It is a great book for young children getting ready to be older siblings. The illustrations are bright and they keep the child’s attention, and the dialogue is short and easy to remember. It also gives parents a reminder to let children know what they are allowed to do and not simply what they are not supposed to do. Lily also received a great book from her Nana and Gump; I’m a Big Sister by Ronne Randall. This opened up some dialogue for Lily about what was coming. It allowed me to remind her that although the baby would be doing all kinds of things that she wasn’t, she was doing lots of things that the baby can’t do.
While we were in the hospital, Lily stayed with Nana and Gump. I started telling her that she would be having a sleepover with Nana and Gump when the baby comes weeks ahead of time. She was very excited and asked me many times if I was going to the hospital. The day that we packed her bag she became even more excited. Then, the day before the baby arrived we went to a wedding, as I mentioned in the post about Henry’s birth, and we put her bag in the trunk to send to Nana and Gump’s house so that it would be one less thing for us to worry about when the time came. She was very hopeful that that would be the day she would get to go for her sleepover. As luck would have it, it was! When we were getting ready to leave the wedding I got down to her level and told her that she would be staying at the wedding and going home with Nana and Gump. When I asked her if she knew why we were leaving her with Nana and Gump she told me that I was going to the hospital and that the baby was coming. This was great, because when she came to the hospital to visit us she was prepared to meet a new baby.
In my hospital bag, along with all the normal stuff that you are supposed to bring, I packed two wrapped gifts for the new big sister. One from the baby and one from us. The baby gave her a toy high chair that I found at Target on clearance as I wasn’t wanting to spend a lot on these gifts and a pink shirt that I special ordered from a local vendor on Facebook that says “Best Big Sis” in purple letters – her favourite colours. We gave her a book, one I found at Chapters that was a little more expensive than I wanted to spend, but very worth it as it expresses beautifully how special she will always be to us. The book is called You Were the First by Patricia MacLachlan. We have read her this book a few times, I am not sure if she understands it yet, but I know that one day she will, and it means a lot to us every time we take that time to read it to her. I highly recommend this book for anyone having a second child, it will make you cry, but it is great!
Once we came home from the hospital, Lily stayed for one more night with Nana and Gump. When they brought her home they stayed and visited with us for a little while. She got to show them her new big girl room for the first time. I’m not sure what prepared her so well for this transition, but she has adapted to this change remarkably. She is a huge helper with Henry, she helps buckle him into his swing, she covers him with his blanket, she give him his soother when he is upset, she gives me diapers and wipes and throws away the dirty diaper when I change his diapers and she talks with him all the time – she tries to get him to smile or to play with his toys or to calm down with her words. When he is upset I will often hear her telling him, “it’s okay, I’m here.” She is such a loving big sister and we have been very fortunate for how capable she was to adapt to such a huge change!